Bloom Where You're Planted

Topic of the day.....satisfaction with where you live.  :)

Something I've noticed about people is that you always want what you don't have.  I am definitely one of those people, as are the majority of the human race.  Whenever we go on vacation, and talk to people who live and work in the place we are vacationing, they are always saying how they dream and wish about living somewhere else.  And I sit there looking at them like they are INSANE because I go to where they live for a VACATION.

Example.  Last year, my family went on vacation to Sanibel Island, off the coast of FL.  BEAUTIFUL island, AMAZING place.  I would give ANYTHING to live there, and would move there in a heartbeat.  We were talking to a boy who worked in one of the stores we went to, and my dad was just making small talk with him, asking him how he liked living on the island.  The guy confessed that he didn't like it and was very sick of living in such a small place.  He told us that he wanted to go to college up in Jacksonville (I think) and live in the city.  I'm like, "DUDE!!! SERIOUSLY!?!!  The beach is literally across the street!! This place is EPIC, it has great food, nice people, an awesome atmosphere and it's just so beautiful!! Why would you want to give this up to go live in the CITY of all places??? NO NO NO NO!"

Another example.  A few weeks ago, we went to northern FL to visit a big antique show (and meet Savanna's family!!!)  Just minutes before seeing Savanna for the first time, my dad, sister and I walked from our hotel to the small Hess gas station nearby, to buy some snacks and drinks for our hotel room.  We were talking to the cashier, a nice young girl, and she was just asking us where we were from, and if we were enjoying our stay so far at the hotel across the street.  We politely told her where we were from and how much we were loving the weather, scenery and atmosphere of the city we were in.  She told us that she was tired of it and wanted to move to Orlando, where she used to live.  She said it was "too in the sticks" and that she craved city life. Again, I was thinking, "WHAT?? How can you NOT like this??? The weather is beautiful, the people are so nice, the nature is amazing, and you want to go to the CITY??? WHAT?? WHY???"

Once returning from both those vacations (and many others), I always find myself on the other side of that equation.  I always dream about leaving where I live in the city to move to someplace far off, where you can own land and animals and just have SPACE.  I find myself dreaming about living in a pretty little house on the beach, having a desk set up by a window overlooking the ocean, and doing all my writing/editing from there.  I always find myself wishing and praying that by some miracle we would be able to get up and move, buy some land and start a farm, or enjoy some peace and quiet in a tiny community where everyone knows each other and everyone is nice to one another.

But then I remember what my mother always tells me in situations like this.....God put us where he did for a reason.  You never know who you're going to touch by a small action you make in your community.  Sometimes I hate where I live...I can find tons of faults.  There's too much crime, too many annoying/rude kids on our street (we live near two public schools...elementary and middle), there's too much traffic, too many accidents, the stores are too busy, the people are rude, no one speaks english.....
But I forget how awesome my city is.  My dad works for our city, and I know a lot of the people who make our city work and run.  I know the City Manager, many commissioners, the HR Director (My Daddy! ;D), people in Marketing, the Fire Chief, many fire-fighters, several police-people, people in finance, aquatics, community relations, the lady who runs the help desk, the people who work in the mailroom, and many more!!!  The ladies in my dad's office are like a second family to me and my sister, and many others in the city are such wonderful people, who are blessings to us all, and many don't even realize what they do to make our city what it is!

We have fabulous fire-fighters and police-people for crime and accidents, which happen ANYWHERE anyway.  I know people who work at our local Publix, Wal-Mart, CVS, 7-11 and more.  They are all good people too.  I am proud of my city...of my COMMUNITY, even though it sometimes makes me frustrated.  Of course I dream of living somewhere else....we all do.

Now I shall pull a Yoda quote to prove my point...
"Many years, this one I have watched.  As he looked away, to the future, never his mind on where he was.  What he was doing!"
If you don't speak Star Wars....essentially that means that Yoda watched as Luke spent his whole childhood growing up wishing he were somewhere else, and not embracing where he was when he was there.  Don't do that.  Don't spend your life wishing you were someone else, living somewhere else, or doing something else.  Be yourself, and enjoy life.  Enjoy the here and now, and embrace your city/town/community.  Even if your closest neighbor is five miles away, or you only see your friends once a week.  Make the connections, and don't spend your entire life wishing you were somewhere else.

This has been on my heart lately, because I have been struggling with this.  After coming home from our latest trip to north FL, I wanted to move there SO BAD.  I still do.  And before you ask, no it's not just because Savanna lives up there....though that does help.  ;)  I loved the atmosphere, the people, the stores, the food, the "take it easy" and "slow down" sort of attitude it had.  I didn't feel rushed, I didn't feel like I was moving at superspeed, I felt at peace and relaxed.  As soon as we got home though, I was rushing off to orchestra, and the next day I did school all day, took my sister to piano, did more school, took two tests, and got sick.  I felt like everything that I loved so much while on vacation disappeared when I returned home, and I looked for anything and everything to blame all that emotion on.  I was mad at our city, and how crowded and busy it was, I was mad at the crime, for waking me up at 3am with sirens, and at all the annoying drivers on the roads for making my mom and dad tense in the car over traffic.  Everything went back to normal.....no one (mainly my mom) was as easy going and carefree as we were when we were on vacation, and I was utterly disappointed in that.

Now though, two weeks being home, I am realizing that when the sirens wake me up at 3am, that means that our amazing men and women who work every day to save lives and protect us, are just doing their jobs.  And the annoying drivers will eventually get what's coming to them, and I pray for the safety of others, who DO obey the rules of the road.  When our city is crowded and busy, it is good economically and promotes good commerce for us.  Sometimes we have to change our perspective and see that maybe things aren't so bad after all.

I hope you enjoyed another "inspirational" by me. ;)  More of these to come soon.

No Perfect People Allowed

Perfectionists.  That's the topic for the day, folks.

One of my best friends in the galaxy is a huge perfectionist.  I used to be one too, until I grew out of it....in a way.

Actually...I didn't grow out of being a perfectionist, I just realized that there is no such thing as perfect.  The thing that really got me to believe that was my church.  They have a slogan, and it says "No Perfect People Allowed" (hence the name for this post).  For a long time I strived to be as perfect as physically possible.  I wanted to be perfect for my mom and dad, for my teachers, for my friends and everyone, except myself and God.  I have to admit that when I was younger, I wasn't a strong Christian.  I knew that Jesus loved me, and what Easter Sunday meant, but that personal relationship that I have now was not there.  Now I know that I live for HIM and HIM alone, and that HE is perfect, so I don't have to be.  :)

So this post goes out to all of those who are battling with perfection.  Guess what?  It only exists in ONE person, and it's not you.  It's not me, it's not that girl at school who has perfect hair, perfect makeup, perfect body, it's not the guy at your co-op with the perfect smile, perfect laugh and perfect eyes....
It's Jesus.  Jesus and Jesus alone is the ONLY perfect person to EVER walk the planet.  No one but Him will be perfect, so STOP TRYING.

Now, I must clarify.  I said stop trying....but I mean only to stop trying PERFECT.  Because everyone needs to try their absolute BEST at EVERYTHING they do.  We are to Glorify the Lord through our work, and he deserves nothing but the best!!!  Again, though he wants the best, he wants OUR best, not a generic PERFECT or socially-suggested CORRECT.  God wants our hearts, which are perfect in his eyes.  <3

So to my perfectionist friends, stop focusing on being or writing or making the perfect thing.  Jesus doesn't care if you look perfect, or write perfect stories, or do perfect drawings.  He just wants you to use the gifts He gave you to your full potential.  As long as you do that, you are perfect in his eyes.

Do what you love, and love what you do, and just be yourself.  You don't have anything to prove, except to Jesus Christ, who already knows it all anyway.  ;)

Go out and do your best in EVERYTHING my friends!!!  And remember, no perfect people are allowed. ;)

Hello There!

Hey friends!!! I've been sorta missing in action for a few days....I better explain why.

Well, last weekend was the highlight of my life thus far.  You're welcome to learn all about that awesome fun on mine and the amazing Savanna's blog:  Fangirls on Felucia.  Here's what you'll find out about......THE BEST WEEKEND OF MY LIFE.  :D

Here's a hint.

Now.  I'm working on some more deep and thought provoking posts that have seemingly taken over my blog and I'm okay with that. ;)  I enjoy writing my thoughts and ponderings and ideas.  That's what Blogging is all about.  I hope my latest post (published probably by the weekend if I get a chance to finish writing it) won't disappoint. ;)

Love you all, thank you for everything!!!  Here are a few more links to check out before you go! ;)

White Lace Cottage - This is my aunt's blog!! I helped design it and she writes FANTASTIC posts!! ;)  Love you Auntie A! ;)

Like Daughter, Like Mother - My mom's blog!!!! Her latest post is very, very thought provoking.  She's where I get it from. ;)

Through Two Blue Eyes - My amazing friend Jamie's blog!!!!!  Jamie, I love your blog and everything you write about!!!! You rock! :D

Jedi With A Purpose - My Tumblr. Check it out, I rock hard. ;)

Fangirl Swag - Savanna's Tumblr.  She's even cooler, and a newbie at Tumblring. ;)

Okay, more to come SOON!!! :D

Happy Valentine's Day!

“"I’m looking for qualities beyond the physical" ~Dr. Erskine in Captain America

A common misconception in my generation and especially among girls is that if you see a boy, who is physically attractive, and you look at him, even for a moment, you are automatically in love. 

Well guess what?  I am firmly against this.  It annoys me to no end when people do this.  First of all, I am only fifteen, way too young to be dating or even looking at boys that way.  Second, if it’s for fun and just joking…so be it, that’s cool, just don’t make it serious. 

It seems like I am constantly picking at my IRL (in “real life”) friends…but this gets me often.  Okay, so allow me to set the scene. 

I am at P.E. group, where there are about five or six other girls (including me) and about twelve to fifteen other guys.  A few of those guys happen to be fairly attractive.  They’re athletic and are honestly pretty cute.  Just because I look at them, or notice that they exist, or remember their name does NOT mean that I am in love with them, or have a crush on them or am planning my wedding to him.  Because the physical attractiveness (though a bonus) is not what matters to me.  I am not looking for a hot guy to date or marry….that’s not what‘s important.  I want a good man as my boyfriend/husband. 

I think this is why I am attracted to the fictional character of Steve Rogers.  He is a GOOD MAN.  Yes, he’s incredibly physically attractive, but that’s a bonus.  I liked “skinny” Steve….before he became Captain America.  I like his heart.  He has a good heart; he cares for others and thinks of them before himself. He respects women and his friends, and himself.  He is humble.  He is kind. 

I want my husband to be like Steve Rogers.  I want a man who has a strong heart for God, and a firm foundation in his faith.  I want a man who will tell me the truth, and also what I want to hear.  I want a man who will love me for me, not because I am a super skinny lingerie model, or have a big butt or large chest or anything like that.  I want a guy who will geek out with me, get excited over Star Wars and Super Heroes, and who speaks my language.  I want someone who knows my heart and is my best friend.  I want someone who agrees with me politically and morally, and holds the same values I do.  Someone who will want to homeschool.  Someone who will stand by me when the going gets tough.  Someone to laugh with, and who won’t be ashamed if we’re a tad bit insane.  Someone who is humble, and sweet, and loving and smart and loyal and faithful and strong.  Someone who has a good heart.

(yes, that is a steve rogers valentine, made for me by my awesome friend chris!! thanks chris!! :D) 

And I know he is out there.  God has designed that perfect someone for me.  I will wait until he arrives, patiently and mooning over fictional men in the meantime.  But I will wait.  I know that everything happens in God’s perfect time, and that when it is HIS time, things will go according to HIS plan.  ;)

So who else hates it that people of the opposite gender can’t just be friends?!  Who thinks that it’s as annoying as heck when people make a big deal about the stupidest, smallest things that have to do with a boy? 

I do.  I don’t mind if we’re just playing around, but sometimes it just is really annoying, ya know?  I mean….just because I think someone is cute, or is nice, or I remember their name, or I say hi to them doesn’t mean that I automatically “Like-like” that person.  It’s a common misconception among teenage girls…..which is something I really don’t get. 

My mom has pointed out to me that I have no problem being social with people who have common interests as me.  It’s true.  I can talk to a total stranger about Star Wars or Avengers or The Clone Wars, but if there is no common interest, I get pretty awkward.  :P  So if I am awkward around a guy my age, it’s not because I’m madly in love with him and shy to say anything, it’s because I have no clue how to act in front of him or what to say without sounding like a total idiot because there is no common interest. 

One more thing that I need to get off my chest is that this fact about girls and guys not being able to be friends over the age of ten without it being romantic is true even for internet friendships.  I am friends with a few awesome guys, all really nice and cool, who I talk to often.  We’ll tweet back and forth, email sometimes, and even chat over Skype.  But as soon as my IRL friends (and even my family before I threatened them with my lightsaber) found out about that, I was suddenly in love. Guess what?  I’m not.  I have friends, and there is no crime in that.  Even internet people do that, which is just rude.  I mean, come on, why is it so wrong for two people to be friends?  Just friends?  Why is that so hard for people to wrap their minds around?  Is it that difficult to understand? 

Now I’ll lead into a second part of this post….Valentine’s Day.  Valentine’s Day is today.  Happy V-Day!!!  This is the day we celebrate love….though I think love should be celebrated every day.  The whole “guys and girls can’t be friend” thing is almost put in neon lights during this time of the year.  Friends dare friends to do stupid things, and to say stupid things, and to make moves and all that.  It’s not right.  If you’ve got a boyfriend or a girlfriend, good for you!!!  Celebrate with them!  Show them how much you care!! But if you don’t, don’t moan and whine about how you’re “Forever Alone” because it’s just lame.  I joke around saying I’m “Forever Alone” all the time, just because it’s a funny Tumblr thing.  But in reality, if you say that, and project that attitude, you WILL be alone.  God meant for man and woman to be partners.  He created women to be a companion to men.  Lifelong companions.  He created that person for you.  Don’t do foolish things just because you /think/ you’re in love.  Because guess what?  Your Heavenly Father loves you more than Johnny from Math Class ever will, and He will send that right person into your life when He is good and ready to. 

So don’t rush into things friends, wait upon the Lord, and He’ll show you the path to true love.  I’m letting God write my love story, while I fantasize about it in movies and books.  And that’s cool; it’s fun to think about it now.  Just wait and let HIM do His job, and you’ll get the fairytale ending more amazing than you ever could have dreamed. 

Happy Valentine’s Day everyone… I love you.  :)

Time For Some Music

I'm in a sing-songy mood right now.....so I'm going to share a few of my favorite songs with you all!!! :D Hope you don't mind! ;)

One of my favorite bands....The Band Perry, is awesome!!!  This was the first song I heard from them, several summers ago!  I love this song so much....I know all the words!!  It's just a cute, feel-good song. ;)

This is my current favorite song (as far as Country Music goes).  Lady Antebellum (my all time favorite band)'s new album Own The Night has me totally hooked.  I got it for Christmas. ;)  This is the single from that album, and I LOOOOOOVE IT.  I just can't stop listening to this song!!!!

Don't you judge me....I know this is a song that was featured on a show on Disney Channel, but i love this song.  Some of the lyrics are wrong, but still, listen to the song itself.  It's EPIC. :D

My favorite song off of the How To Train Your Dragon soundtrack.  That movie has the most BEAUTIFUL music!!! ;D  I'm teaching myself to play this on the viola. ;D

Alright......warning time. This song is called "Party Rock Anthem".  It's my current not-country-or-soundtrack-song.  It is, however, got a few questionable lyrics in there.  If you don't want to see that, don't watch the video or listen too closely to the song.  I still absolutely love this song despite it's few lyric mishaps. xD  It's the ultimate dance song, and party anthem!  ;D

Keith Urban.....mmmhhhmmmm. :D  This is my favorite song by him.  My family and i LOVE it.  :D  It's just so sweet and cute and awesome!!!  I never fail to grin whenever this song plays. ;)

Meet the Robinsons....my favorite Disney Movie. :D It's the best one....really. ;)  And it's soundtrack is wonderful.  This is my favorite song. :D I sing this ALL DAY LONG.  ;D

We warm up the little girls by doing "adagio" to this song.  Essentially, it's do as I do, and we (the teachers) dance up front and the little girls copy us.  I've got it memorized to this song.  Plus, it's my all time favorite Disney classic song. ;D

My sister's ballet song is to this one this year, and I am JEALOUS!!!!!!!!!!  I LOVE THIS SONG.  Seriously, I've liked/loved it for a long time.  I'm gonna learn my sister's dance just so I can enjoy it.  XD

BEST. SONG. EVER.  Nuff Said.

One of my main life-theme-songs.  ;)  Change the lyrics to fit a girl and you've got me. ;D

LOVE. THIS. MOVIE. AND. SONG. SO. MUCH. MUST. HAVE. THE. SOUNDTRACK. NOW.

*bawls*  This is my latest obsession song.  It's gotten me through the past few weeks. ;)  Savanna.....look......it's our song!!!!!  *tackle hugs*

Ooohh....as much as I love the Wicked soundtrack, this might be my favorite song on their.  I didn't listen to it for a while, just the happy, everyone-knows-those-songs, songs....but once I heard it once, I needed to listen to it incessantly until I knew all the words. ;)  It ties with No Good Deed as my favorite. ;D

Thor has an incredible soundtrack.  The music often moves me to tears.  :')

I had to feature Lemonade Mouth.......I am a sucker for a good Disney Channel Original Movie, and this one hit it outta the park.  ;)  That's rare for me to say I actually liked one of the Disney movies, they all seem to be rather shallow, plot non-existent, and stupid.  ;P I love Lemonade Mouth though, and the songs are just great. ;) Tar-Tar, it's our song! :D

My second favorite song on the Thor soundtrack.  Flawless. ;D

IRON. MAN.  I love this song!!!!!! ;D

Owl City has been an obsession of mine for like, forever.  ;)  This song brings back so many good memories!!! ;D  *happy sigh*

I'm not sure on all of the lyrics in this song, just a warning....but it's my song for dance recital this year. :D

My sister's tap song this year.  I know the dance already, and I practice it with her often. ;D

In honor of the release of TPM in 3D that I'm going to see on Friday if it kills me.......;D *MAJOR HINT THERE MOM*

ASDFJKL;ASDFJKL;ADSJFK;LADJFK; ROGUES ASJDKF;LADJLF;KJADJKFL;AJDKL;FJADJL;FK

I absolutely love Vitamin String Quartet.  They are right up my alley! ;)  LOVE LOVE LOVE.

I play this song in Orchestra.....isn't it gorgeous?!  That part in the beginning, right before she starts singing, where the harp plays that series of notes over and over?  Yeah, I play that.  Loudly.  I get to rock it out on my viola because that's a SOLO, BABY! ;) Also, the part where she sings in the break before repeating the beginning, I play that too.  I play lots of this actually.....it's making me very excited. XDD

Too hilarious not to include. ;)

Another new favorite song........Adele.....ROLLING IN THE DEEEEEEEEEEP.  :)  I sing this song all the time.  ALL THE TIME.  With different lyrics too.

Dear Mom:
IONS IN THE CLOUDSSSSSS.......IONS IN THE CLOOUUUUUUUDDDSSSS.  :D

Dear everyone else:
Ignore that last statement.

Thanks for listening!  ;)  I own none of these songs or videos, just the words and stories I put after them. XD

Haters Gonna Hate

This is something I seriously don't understand.  Haters.

If you hate something so much, why do you watch it?  Why keep up with it?  If all it does is annoy you, bother you, upset you and you never are satisfied, why do you keep coming back to the topic?  Is it all that important?

I've noticed in recent weeks/months/etc that haters keep popping up everywhere.  People who will make you feel bad or feel angry about something that you LOVE and that you are passionate about.  They are NEVER satisfied, and they are NEVER happy with just leaving a topic alone.  Then they pretend like it's just an opinion and it's a free country.

Honestly, opinion went out the window when the bashing occurred.  Here is my personal guide to the How To Avoid Being A Hater.  Written by Fallon, the Nice Person.

1.  If you don't like something, don't make it such a HUUUUUGEEEE Deal!  Chances are, not many people care too much if you hate something with your heart and soul.  Example.  I HATE Lux and Ahsoka's "relationship" in TCW.  I ranted and raved about it for one night, but just among my friends who shared similar opinion (this goes into step 2).  I didn't however, carry this on for AGES, making a HUGE deal about how much I HATED it to EVERYONE around me.

2.  If you KNOW that someone doesn't like something, DO NOT TALK ABOUT IT WITH THEM.  Some of my best friends have very different opinions from me.  That's cool, it's a free country.  You are allowed your first amendment right (this leads into step 3).  But if you know something bothers someone, DO NOT BUG THEM CONSTANTLY ABOUT IT.  Example.  My extremely good friend Tara hates Duchess Satine.  I like Satine.  So guess what?  We don't talk about Satine with each other!!!!  To avoid hurt feelings or bashed characters, we simply don't talk about it!!!  IT IS THAT EASY.  CLOSE YOUR KEYBOARD/MOUTH AND LEAVE THE SUBJECT ALONE!

3.  Do NOT abuse your first amendment right.  The first amendment states that you have the right to freedom of speech.  Yes, that is true, but DO NOT ABUSE THAT RIGHT.  Do not blabber on hurting others for no reason.  This rule is simple, your opinion is free to be yours, but it is not meant to be law.  It is not the only opinion in the world.  DO NOT ACT LIKE IT.

4.  Feel free to express your opinion, with OTHER PEOPLE IN MIND.  This goes with the second step.  If someone doesn't like something, DON'T BRING IT UP JUST TO MAKE THEM UPSET.  This also goes for if someone likes something.  If they like it, and you don't, just let it go!!!  Don't make them feel bad by ruining something they LOVE.

Finally, step five.

5.  WWJD?  What would Jesus do?  Was Jesus a hater?  I don't think so.  I 'm positive.  Jesus was a lover.  Be like Jesus, love thy neighbor, love thy enemy, give encouragement and support to those around you.  Trivial little things that you hate probably don't matter all that much.  It's not very important in the grand scheme of things.

One final thought..... don't let haters get you down!  You can't fix them or stop them from hating.  Hatah's Gon Hate!

Be yourself, love what you do, and don't be a hater. ;)

Irresistibly Sweet Blog Award

Apparently my blog has been found Irresistibly Sweet by other blogger friends!!!!  ;)  Thanks to J&J Productions, Savanna and others who gave it to all their followers. ;D

Rules:  Post Seven Things About Yourself
Award to Ten Other Bloggers

Things about me.......
1.  I am madly in love with Captain America (Steve Rogers)
2.  I have a new blog that I am writing with my cousin Ember.  It's about Movie Reviews.  See it HERE
3.  I have been to Disney World countless times, and I am yet to ever get tired of going.
4.  I am a "fraidy cat".  I hate halloween and  all things creepy/scary.
5.  I have 100+ Star Wars books.
6.  I am more than extremely excited for Avengers.  I get so incredibly excited whenever I think about it.
7.  I have seen Captain America 27 times since getting it for Christmas.

I award this to all my fellow Blogger Friends who haven't already received it!!!  ;)  Enjoy friends!!!

P.S. Like my new signature?  ;D

Hi, I'm Socially Awkward.

*sighs* It's true.  I've been thinking about this a lot lately.  Most homeschoolers are labeled as "unsocialized".  It's true, some of us don't have as many friends (or enemies) as kids who go to public school, but as it's been pointed out by many people, both from the internet, in real life and in my immediate family (thank you Ember), homeschoolers have to actively seek out friendships, so they are naturally less shy than other people.

Ehhh.....I beg to differ.  The "seeking out friendships" part has been getting to me recently.  It's not that I don't like my friends, or don't have any friends...I do!  I have amazing friends!  Both in "real life" and on the internet.  I love my internet friends just as much as I do my "IRL" friends.  I just wish I was a little less weird sometimes.

I mean c'mon.  Look at me.  I'm a total geek who lives on the internet, has multiple relationships with multiple fictional characters, enjoys watching sappy movies as well as movies that would normally be classified as a "boy movie", a writer, a fan of country music, a dancer and I play viola.  How many of those sound normal to you?  (if you're my twin, don't say all of them, you do not count. XD)

Who is going to want to be friends with, talk to, or even acknowledge someone like that?  Someone who is usually too shy to even make eye contact with other people her age, but can talk to adults without a problem, and teach little kids even easier.  Someone who either stays to herself, awkwardly ignoring everyone, or is sitting by herself at the co-op lunch room because her mom was late to pick her up.  Someone like me.

I don't always come off as socially awkward, especially on the internet. In "real life"though.....I just can't handle being with other people my age.  Other teenagers who are either my age, younger than me, or older than me, I don't do well with.  If they're younger, they're usually incredibly immature and hard to keep good conversation with (this isn't judging all younger kids, just some.)  And older kids are usually far too cliquey, not wanting anyone or anything else inside their own private little circle of friends.  It's hard to meet new people if they don't even notice you exist.

Lately, my best friend (Maryanna) has been trying to get me interested in sitting with the other kids from our group at P.E.  This includes a few girls, a ton of guys, and a lot of awkward social tension on my end.  I can't seem to make the connection.  I am so much better off with younger kids, and adults.  My dad says it's normal for me to be awkward with other people my age...because I'm a teenager and at this point in time, everyone is growing and changing and it's not really our faults.  My mother, however, has zero sympathy for me, and accuses me of judging others.  I am judging.  Not mean judging, but you judge all the time.  If the chair is wet, you judge that it's not fit for you to sit in.  If there is no milk in the refrigerator, you judge that someone else drank it before you could.  (stupid analogies, but you get my point.)

I'm not judging cruelly, by looks, or even by the words people speak.  As my mother always says, Actions Speak Louder Than Words.  I will admit to judging by actions.  Is that person good at that sport?  Are they nice to the girls?  Are they nice to their friends?  Do they use bad language?  Are they polite?  Etc, etc, etc.  If the person has poor behavior, than it's my place in my own self to judge what I think about it, and what I should do associating with them.  Are they the kind of person that I should be hanging out with?

Now here is where I get confused.  Maryanna seems to be having trouble with being "invisible".  Especially around guys.  I honestly DO.NOT.CARE. if guys notice I exist.  Remembering my name now and then would be nice (HELLO I AM WEARING A NAMETAG!), but I don't want them to be giving me their undivided attention or anything like that.  When the right guy comes into my life, I'll be ready and waiting.  Until then, I don't mind being slightly invisible.

More than judging others, I judge myself.  I judge what others will look at. What a nerd I am, my clothes, my interests, my taste in music, my taste in movies, everything.
......

I like Star Wars, which is automatically assumed by the majority of the human race to be a nerdy thing to like.  The fact that I live, eat, breath, wear, share, quote, watch, am obsessed with Star Wars doesn't help that.  At all.

I am not even gonna say all the times that I've been mocked by my love of country music.  Apparently that's weird?  Wrong?  I don't see why....

Viola?  What's a viola?  Isn't it just a big violin?  What's the difference?  I'll show you the difference.

I write?  For FUN?  I talk about my writing?  I care more about characters than I do other people?  I am spaced out when playing sports because I'm thinking about my story?  What. A. Freak.

.....

I like Star Wars.  And Avengers.  I understand the comics, and the books, and the movies, and the games.  I can relate to boys and girls of all ages, and I have connected with people unlike any other.  It's an awesome feeling to be so excited by something and then meet someone who likes it just as much as you do.  I can talk to most grown men, having intellectual conversations with them, and even impress them with my knowledge.  I don't let my "geekiness" hold me back from being bold about my fandoms.  I'll wear my Captain America shirt in public, proudly and my Her Universe shirt with even more pride.  I am a fangirl!  Hear me roar!!!

Country music?  I LOVE country music!  I know all the words to most of all the songs!  I can sing Brad Paisley like a pro, and belt out Carrie Underwood extremely off key and no where near her amazing voice, but I do it with joy and with pride.  Luke Bryan, Josh Turner, Brad Paisley, The Band Perry, Rodney Atkins, Blake Shelton, Miranda Lambert, Lady Antebellum.....these are my artists and bands.  Not Lady Gaga or Katy Perry, these people have good souls, good hearts for God, and they aren't afraid to show it.  :)

What's a Viola?  Only the best instrument ever!  It's unique, it's pitched lower than the violin!  It's deeper, richer and harder to play!  I have to dig into that thing....it's making me stronger.  I'm learning to play like a professional, so that someday, I might be one.  I can play Indiana Jones, Star Wars, ET, Superman and other themes in a heartbeat.  I am learning the classics, Handel, Beethoven, Dvorak, Mozart!  I am a violist, and I'm proud!

I write.  I write for FUN.  I LOVE to write. It is my passion!  I'm not ashamed!!!  It's the most thrilling feeling to get lost in your character's dialogue so much that 1000 words later you can go back and read your work with such excitement at what you've written.  I've written two novels.  TWO.  How many kids my age can say that?  Not many.  I weave tales all the time.  I have thoughts going through my brain too often about how much I love to read, and how i love to write, and how I just want to get back home to my computer so I can finish this chapter or finish this paragraph.  I'll stay up to the early hours of the morning, writing.  People asked at P.E. why I was so tired Thursday morning.  I told them that I was up until 3:30am.  "What?!?" they exclaim, "Doing what?!!" I respond with "Writing." and their confused expression is priceless.  ;)
I'm an author.  I love what I do.  I love to write, and I thank God for that gift every day.  I am proud.

......

Don't be afraid of being yourself!!!!!  To Thine Own Self Be True.
You are cool.  You are awesome.  You don't need anyone to tell you that but yourself.  God already knows it, so woman (or man) up and tell YOURSELF this!  Who cares what other people think?  I sure don't!!!  I am 100% fine with being a nerd/geek/loser/weirdo/dork.  I am!  I am happy with my "boy movies".  I'm happy with my "lame country-hick music".  I'm happy with my viola, with my dance, with my writing.  With my life.
I am happy.  I am fulfilled.  I am loved.

I don't need to be popular, or cool, or liked by other people my age.  I'm okay with my friends that I have.  With my best friends, Maryanna and my best friend/cousin Ember.  We'll be weird together.  I'm okay with my internet buddies....they understand me, and they care about me!  What else do I need?  A little human interaction here and there would be nice...but I am no where near concerned about being "socialized".  No, I don't like other people my age.  I still feel really weird, and problematic, and awkward, but I know in my heart, and in my soul that I am the Daughter of a King who is greater than ALL of that. He created me, to be me.  I shouldn't let anyone, ANYONE, hold me back from what my God has in store for me.

God Bless, and stay weird! :D

From the Eyes of a Writer

As a growing writer, I tend to see things differently than the average person.  I don't always notice that I do, but yet, it happens.
I find myself thinking of a story for something as small as a little flower growing as a weed in a flower garden, to a random person in the mall eating a cheeseburger.  It's a little weird, and quite funny.
I have bizarre hobbies too, like people-watching (AKA stalking, lol), and character discussing.  It's fun!

I can't watch movies the same way anymore.  I look at the deeper plot more than the special effects and acting.  I look into the background of the movie and the depth of the different characters. I can think of new plots and storylines and feelings of the characters.

I love it.  It makes for a good writer, to be able to come up with things on a whim like that.  I am constantly getting ideas in my head. I am constantly needing to write stuff down. Just ask my mom, many times a day I'll stop what I'm doing and run into my room to write down a story idea.  Many of them aren't developed (at all) and some of them are just fanfic ideas, but I still write them down, just for the sake of getting the idea out of my head.

I dont' think there's ever been a time where I HAVEN'T been writing a story in my head. Seriously!  I remember even when I was a little kid (my earliest "story" memory is probably from when I was six...) I'd walk around the perimeter of the playground at my school (this was before I was homeschooled, obviously) and just think of story ideas in my head. Back then, I called it my "Imaginary Friends". Now, I call them my "Characters".  ;)  See the difference?  I believe that all good writers once had imaginary friends.  I know I still do.  Their names are Luke Skywalker...Princess Leia....Han Solo.....Mara Jade......Corran Horn....etc.  ;)

AND STEVE ROGERS. (okay, i'm done now xD)

Seriously though....I was the queen of angst before it was cool.  I was always writing, coming up with, and thinking up very depressing or angsty romances, stories and ideas.  I was pretty pathetic actually.  (this may end up leading into a post about my social awkwardness that has risen to become a problem as of late...we'll see.)

In short, what I'd like for you to take away from this post is this: If you are a writer, and you see things differently too, that's okay.  Embrace it.  It just might be your future.  Everything happens for a reason, and ultimately, God doesn't make any junk. ;)

Write on....

Out with the old...in with the NEW!

I am having serious trouble believing that it is going to be 2012 in only a few short hours.  O.O

So many amazing things happened this year!  It's been amazing!!!!  My year in pictures, and then my New Year's Resolutions will follow. ;)

In the very beginning of this year....The Lakehouse Forum was just getting off the ground!  :D  Now we're 92 members strong, and growing!  :)

I opened my blog in Mid-Late January of last year.  Only 20 days until my Blogoversary!!! :)

I've read countless books, gotten more into the Star Wars Expanded Universe, read and published my own Fanfiction, and written a novel.  All this year.  0.0

My Love for Star Wars has grown by leaps and bounds, and has been joined by other fandoms such as:

Indiana Jones

How To Train Your Dragon

Johnny Tremain <3

The Muppets...technically I was already a huge fan, but it's a new phenomenon now!

Pride and Prejudice...thank you Ley. 

TRON: Legacy

MICHAEL BUBLE <333333

Lord of the Rings!

A Very Potter Musical 

Wicked!

Captain America

I have gone on many fabulous vacations.......and had many fun events............

And so many wonderful blessings.  <3

Dear friends, both from the internet realm and 'in real life'...

I love you all so much. This has been an amazing year!!  You all inspire me and encourage me so much!!!  THANK YOU!!!  <33  Here's to another year of rad, epic, fun and fangirl awesomeness!!!!!

Dear family....

I love you all more than I can say.  I hope you all have a wonderful new year, and that we can start anew, learning from our mistakes and spending mroe time together and have even more fun!

Dear baby sister....

YOU ARE NO LONGER A BABY!!! *sobs*  Happy birthday Nutmeg, I love you so much!  Even when you drive me insane, I still love you!!!!!  Have the best Lalaloopsy, American Girl, Button-Tail birthday that ever existed!!!  You are the coolest kid ever!  <3

Dear Ember....

Just remember.... owt rof aet dna aet rof owt.  Uoy rof em dna em rof uoy. Ees you t'nac, yppah woh eb dlouw ew!!!!!!!!!!!  <3

Dear TLF Sisters....I love you all so much!  You're amazing!  And I don't know what I'd do without you.  You all keep me excited and happy.  XD  Keep being your super awesome selves!  ;)  To the mod squad (and our newest additions to the mod squad) YAY FOR US!!!!!!  Love you all!!!!!

Dear Blogger Friends, I love you all!!!!!!!!!  Keep reading, writing and posting!  ;) 

Now, my new year's resolutions! :D

This year, I plan to:

Lose weight. (cliche huh? But seriously, I want to lose like 30 lbs before Celebration VI.)

Work really hard in school.  Finish everything on time. 

Practice my Viola daily.  Get REALLY GOOD at it. ;)

Read my Bible daily.

Go FFA!  (Future Farmers of America) ;)

Meet up with an internet friend (or many internet friends!!!!!)

Write more blog posts.

Succeed at Project 365!

Stop procrastinating.

Finish my NaNo novel from 2011. 

Finish Celestial Eclipse (fanfic)

Finish all my other fanfics.

Watch all the Avengers films before The Avengers is released. (watch them all with Ember/Chibi)

Write another novel.

Good goals?

What are YOUR New Years Resolutions?!? 

HAPPY NEW YEAR GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!!  I AM FROM THE FUTURE NOW......it's officially 2012!!!!!!!!!!!!

P.S. Check out my Photography blog!!!!!  :)  http://fallon365pictures.blogspot.com/  I'll be using it for this AMAZING photography project that will take ALLLLL YEAR!  It's called: "Project 365!"  ;)

Love you all!!!!!!!!!!!!! <333